finding my "groove" as a stay-at-home mama

Friday, November 15, 2013

As you already know, I have decided to stay home for time being withmy little angel.  I am soooo excited to have this opportunity and I never want to take it for granted.  Since my little princess was born there have been easy days, and days that are a bit harder.  This is all due to the lack of sleep, me not knowing what I’m doing as a mama, me being overwhelmed with duties and well – life.  Whether you’re a stay at home mama or you work 60 hours a week, all moms out there know how hard it is to keep a house in order, feed the people that live in it, love and nurture those people – oh and take care of yourself.  And so I have had to sort of find my groove if you will. 

Between months 2-3 of little G’s magical life, I was in sort of a funk.  And this was even after I had decided to stay at home!  I mean – how ungrateful right?  I found myself walking around kind of waiting for Georgia to wake up.  I didn’t know what to do with myself while she was sleeping.  Sure – the house was a mess and laundry was sky high but it’s like I was too overwhelmed to know where to begin.  Luckily my mama lives close by and she helped me sort of get a routine going, and I have found – for me personally – a routine is necessary.  SO here are some things that have helped me.

I need a “house routine” as in – I clean on Thursdays and do laundry on Monday and Wednesdays – that way I don’t get overwhelmed by everything on one day. For some people this is too much structure, for me it is extremely necessary.  I also love having a clean house Thursday night and for the whole weekend.

I get up and put on clothes 4 out of 5 days a week.  For a while I was LIVING in my pajamas.  Day in and day out – and let me tell you there is nothing wrong with this at first.  New mamas – take the time you need to rest and recover – but it was time for me to get moving a little and I found it hard to be motivated when it was 5pm and me and Georgia were both still in our PJs. 

I schedule outings with friends every week.  Maybe a walk – maybe a lunch date.  Something.  I need adult interaction.  This is difficult for me because in some ways I am kinndaaaaaaaaaaaa a recluse.  At first it was because I had a bit of anxiety when I thought about taking G out by myself – I mean what if she poops all over me at Chik-fil-A (oh, wait she did that already), or has a temper tantrum in the middle of Target (yep, checked that one off the list too)?  If it were up to me I would stay cozy in my house with my baby all day, every day.  Only I’ve realized that for my personal well-being I need to get out.  Luckily I have amazing friends with babes who invite me for walks or coffee and if/when G has a meltdown – well that’s OK too. 

I read this post by Britt – and basically I try to do everything on her list.  It helped me to gain sanity and realize I wasn’t the only one struggling with this.  So thanks Britt J

Time with Jesus.  HELLO?! This one should have been obvious right?  But I’m sort of thick-headed at time and it just wasn’t.  I need time to sit and be still.  I need time to pray.  I need time to read my devotional.  That is how I recharge.

And last – I hold myself to a standard of GRACE not perfection.  I have that print in my living room as a constant reminder that I’m not perfect – not a perfect mama, not a perfect wife, house-keeper (in fact, I’m pretty terrible at that one) and not a perfect cook.  But I don’t beat myself up.  I do the best I can and I hold my baby and my husband close at night – and that my friends, is happiness.


Ashley Brickner said...

Great post! I don't stay at home but also find that I really need a routine! Works so much better than being overwhelmed. :) and your boss is adorable!

Katie Cook said...

This is so so good! I'm turning to you when I have a little one:) Love you!!

Kala said...

She is so adorable, how could you not want to spend every second with her!

Unknown said...

You are so sweet Denise! Thank you for your sweet words. It means a lot to me to know my post was so helpful. Sometimes I forget how empowering the blog world really is. Knowing my post helped you makes me feel so thankful :)
You are doing a great job! I promise your days will get a lot easier very soon. Then again, you may be more busy too. But the interaction phase is so fun, and it just began for us. I feel like scarlett mocks everything I do now, which is scary haha.
Your post is so very inspirational as well, glad you wrote what helps you as well, because I definitely need to make more time for prayer. You are amazing, love you girl!

Lynzy said...

Oh my goodness! This post speaks to me! I will be heading back to work in January (4 months after O was born) and will only be working 24 hours a day...however, I find myself in a funk even now - in pajamas all day with a disaster of a house and I just feel overwhelmed. Not to mention that the hubs is gone in NYC the most of this month and she has a meltdown every day after dinner and cries until bedtime - its exhausting. I really need to start appreciating every moment and the fact that this little bundle wont be this small forever. Thanks for this!xx

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