finding my "groove" as a stay-at-home mama

Friday, November 15, 2013

As you already know, I have decided to stay home for time being withmy little angel.  I am soooo excited to have this opportunity and I never want to take it for granted.  Since my little princess was born there have been easy days, and days that are a bit harder.  This is all due to the lack of sleep, me not knowing what I’m doing as a mama, me being overwhelmed with duties and well – life.  Whether you’re a stay at home mama or you work 60 hours a week, all moms out there know how hard it is to keep a house in order, feed the people that live in it, love and nurture those people – oh and take care of yourself.  And so I have had to sort of find my groove if you will. 

Between months 2-3 of little G’s magical life, I was in sort of a funk.  And this was even after I had decided to stay at home!  I mean – how ungrateful right?  I found myself walking around kind of waiting for Georgia to wake up.  I didn’t know what to do with myself while she was sleeping.  Sure – the house was a mess and laundry was sky high but it’s like I was too overwhelmed to know where to begin.  Luckily my mama lives close by and she helped me sort of get a routine going, and I have found – for me personally – a routine is necessary.  SO here are some things that have helped me.

I need a “house routine” as in – I clean on Thursdays and do laundry on Monday and Wednesdays – that way I don’t get overwhelmed by everything on one day. For some people this is too much structure, for me it is extremely necessary.  I also love having a clean house Thursday night and for the whole weekend.

I get up and put on clothes 4 out of 5 days a week.  For a while I was LIVING in my pajamas.  Day in and day out – and let me tell you there is nothing wrong with this at first.  New mamas – take the time you need to rest and recover – but it was time for me to get moving a little and I found it hard to be motivated when it was 5pm and me and Georgia were both still in our PJs. 

I schedule outings with friends every week.  Maybe a walk – maybe a lunch date.  Something.  I need adult interaction.  This is difficult for me because in some ways I am kinndaaaaaaaaaaaa a recluse.  At first it was because I had a bit of anxiety when I thought about taking G out by myself – I mean what if she poops all over me at Chik-fil-A (oh, wait she did that already), or has a temper tantrum in the middle of Target (yep, checked that one off the list too)?  If it were up to me I would stay cozy in my house with my baby all day, every day.  Only I’ve realized that for my personal well-being I need to get out.  Luckily I have amazing friends with babes who invite me for walks or coffee and if/when G has a meltdown – well that’s OK too. 

I read this post by Britt – and basically I try to do everything on her list.  It helped me to gain sanity and realize I wasn’t the only one struggling with this.  So thanks Britt J

Time with Jesus.  HELLO?! This one should have been obvious right?  But I’m sort of thick-headed at time and it just wasn’t.  I need time to sit and be still.  I need time to pray.  I need time to read my devotional.  That is how I recharge.

And last – I hold myself to a standard of GRACE not perfection.  I have that print in my living room as a constant reminder that I’m not perfect – not a perfect mama, not a perfect wife, house-keeper (in fact, I’m pretty terrible at that one) and not a perfect cook.  But I don’t beat myself up.  I do the best I can and I hold my baby and my husband close at night – and that my friends, is happiness.


Ashley @ Words About Waverly said...

Great post! I don't stay at home but also find that I really need a routine! Works so much better than being overwhelmed. :) and your boss is adorable!

Katie Cook said...

This is so so good! I'm turning to you when I have a little one:) Love you!!

Kala Bernier said...

She is so adorable, how could you not want to spend every second with her!

Britt R said...

You are so sweet Denise! Thank you for your sweet words. It means a lot to me to know my post was so helpful. Sometimes I forget how empowering the blog world really is. Knowing my post helped you makes me feel so thankful :)
You are doing a great job! I promise your days will get a lot easier very soon. Then again, you may be more busy too. But the interaction phase is so fun, and it just began for us. I feel like scarlett mocks everything I do now, which is scary haha.
Your post is so very inspirational as well, glad you wrote what helps you as well, because I definitely need to make more time for prayer. You are amazing, love you girl!

Lynzy said...

Oh my goodness! This post speaks to me! I will be heading back to work in January (4 months after O was born) and will only be working 24 hours a day...however, I find myself in a funk even now - in pajamas all day with a disaster of a house and I just feel overwhelmed. Not to mention that the hubs is gone in NYC the most of this month and she has a meltdown every day after dinner and cries until bedtime - its exhausting. I really need to start appreciating every moment and the fact that this little bundle wont be this small forever. Thanks for this!xx

Made With Love By The Dutch Lady Designs