thoughts on this blog lately...

Sneak peak of a maternity session i had the other night with the amazingly, talented Kaylla Spencer!  More to come!

so i've been thinking a lot about this little blog of mine lately.  truth is - i love it.  i love this little online community and i have honestly met some amazing friends through blogging.  i love when a friend texts me and says "oh i needed what you wrote today on your blog!."  not that i am any sort of remedy for anything but the thought of possibly providing encouragement to even one person makes me smile.  i love sharing personal experiences and then connecting with someone who feels the same or has gone through the same thing.  this life on earth can feel lonely sometimes, even when you are surrounded with others, and sometimes just reading through someone else's experience can make you realize your not alone at all.  jesus put us on this earth to encourage one another and build each other up, all while pointing one another to Him, and ultimately i hope i am able to do that.  since i've become a mom i've also found comfort and community when i am able to post about georgia and what she's learning or struggling with.  the support and advice i've gained from so many of you is priceless.

but then there's the other side of blogging.  the fear of sharing too much.  i've never worried about sharing too much about my life.  i've always been an open book with my friends and family and i firmly believe that i am called to share certain experiences in hopes of encouraging others.  for some it may seem like too much but for me, it's not.  and matt has always been trusting and supportive of whatever i feel like putting on this blog.  so it's really not matt or me i'm worried about - it's my babies.  i obviously post a ton of pictures on here of georgia and i love doing so.  i love when my gaga in virginia texts me or mentions to my dad that it made her day when she saw the blog post of georgia pictures.  i love that.  and i love reading my friends blogs and keeping up with their lives and their littles.  but i also want to protect her and my soon to be baby boy.  i have always been conscious of what i post about them anyway but with the internet these days i wonder if i should be even more careful?  a good friend of mine recently made her blog password protected and i've been considering that for a while too.  so anyways, these are all of the thoughts swirling in my head.  i would love to hear what you other mamas/bloggers think about censorship/kid stuff, etc?  

have a blessed weekend!  xox

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Something I'm Struggling With // Day 20 of the Challenge

29 weeks

So on Mondays (sometimes Tuesdays) I try and post something baby-related.  Whether it’s a pregnancy update or a letter to Georgia.  I’ve been pretty faithful about these even when the rest of my blogging has been slack.  Well today, I’m still talking babies… kinda.  I’m joining Jenni again for her Blog Every Day in May Challenge. 

Her orders: Day 20, Monday: Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now

Well.  Well.  Well.  It just so happens that the something I’m struggling with right now has to do with this little babe in my belly.  I am soooooooo excited to meet her.  Like complete excitement overload right now.  When she starts kicking at night I scream “Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek come look!” and make Matt rush over every single time.  I talk to her all the time too.  So does Matt.  He has a funny/adorable/sweet daddy voice he uses and it melts my heart.  I don’t want to wish time away at all.  I have showers to look forward to and lots still on my to-do list but my oh my!  I can’t wait to meet my baby girl.  I know these next 10 weeks are going to fly by and honestly?  I hope they do!!! 

But OK back to the challenge.  Something I’m struggling with.  This is more of a fear of mine I suppose but I am PETRIFIED of labor.  Yes I want to meet my baby girl more than there are stars in the sky – but the process that leads up to that meet and greet?  Leaves me intensely scared.  I’ve had nightmares about the whole thing that only a crazy person would have (not remembering the birth of my child, the doctor showing me an epidural that was 6 feet tall and 6 feet wide, oh and losing my child after labor!).  Now luckily most of my dreams are crazy bananas and most likely will not happen.  Whew.  Sigh of relief.  But then there’s these things that I am terrified of that really could happen.  Like the pain.  That will definitely happen.  I don’t take pain too well either.  I’ve thought about a doula for my labor and read birth story after birth story comparing natural births and births getting an epidural.  I’ve researched the chances of a C-section and the affects it has on the mom and baby.  I’ve had sweet friends go through all of these birth processes in the past 4 months.  But none of that seems to make me feel better.  I still don’t know exactly what my “birth plan” is and frankly the whole labor part in general scares the bajeebers out of me.  Why can’t they pump me with red wine during labor instead?  That relaxes me just fine…

So there you have it.  I’ve got about 10 weeks until it’s go time.  Maybe even less!  But right now that is what I’m struggling with.  I pray about it a lot, and if you think about, and want to add me in your prayers – will you pray too?  Sometimes I even feel so repetitive like God is annoyed with me.  Like ummmm, you asked for the same thing yesterday (an easy delivery and a healthy baby).  But luckily God knows how crazy I am.  In fact, He created me that way.  So for the next 10 months I will remain on my knees.  Praying for an easy delivery and a healthy baby.  But also for peace, comfort and strength through Him on that beautiful day I get to meet my baby girl

30 weeks

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10 Things That Make Me Really Happy // Day 14 of the Challenge

I’m joining Jenni again for the Blog Every Day in May Challenge!  No, I'm not blogging every day in May.  But she said you can pop in when you want to and that is what I'm doing :)

10 Things That Make Me Really Happy

Feeling my baby wiggle inside my belly

Red wine

Mint chocolate chip ice cream

Long talks with my mommy

Being by myself to reflect and recharge

Kenny Chesney’s music

My handsome husband’s smile

My pup's excitement when I come home

Baking

Saltwater on my skin

What about you?

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Weekend and Guest post

a few weeks ago at 22 weeks

Happy Monday!  Hope y'all had a great weekend!  Mine was spent with sweet family in Athens Georgia watching my father-in-law get recognized at a Baseball Alumni game.  Go Dawgs!  I'll have pictures and more on that trip later, but today I'm over at Baubles and Cocktails talking about how to dress while pregnant. 

Check it out HERE 

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Happy Birthday GI! Why I blog

Since I’ve started this here blog of mine, a exactly one year ago today, I’ve received so much feedback and so much support.  It’s been humbling and so gratifying.  Posts that I’ve written where I let myself be vulnerable were tough, but when I get an email saying that someone needed to read that because they, too, are experiencing something similar, it makes it all worth the while.  

But I’ve gotten some resistance too.  People close to me questioning why I would put something like that on my blog (this post particularly but other too).  Why would I want the whole world knowing my personal business.  And those questions are completely valid.  I am usually a very private person, so starting a blog where I share my heart and soul seems contradicting to many.  And maybe it is.  Or maybe I’ve changed.  Or maybe, just maybe, the world is changing and I’ve chosen these medium as a way to communicate and connect.  

Never have I used this blog to gain sympathy or attention – and I never will.  But I also believe in being real.  I believe that in life you get the good, the bad, the happy, the sad, the easy and the hard and if I portrayed my life to be roses and fairytales every single day, well then where would my authenticity be?  And I think it’s important for those who question to know that – no.  I do not post all of my problems or bad days, or husband arguments, or lazy habits on here.  And I will not start doing that either.  I try to find a balance.  A balance between saying what is real and truthful at the risk of becoming vulnerable, but also sharing things that encourage others.  Because that is why I started this blog.  I started this blog as a safe place.  A safe place for me to write and share and hopefully encourage just one person in wherever they are in their walk of life.  I know a lot of people don’t understand or even agree with why I blog.  I know my sweet old-fashioned mama will never completely understand our generation’s fascination with the internet and all its modes of communication.  But that’s OK.  Just know that what I post on here is real and it’s my heart.  If you think I share too much or too little, sorry.  I share nothing that makes me or my husband feel uncomfortable.  I try to use discretion when posting about friends and family.  And if anything I do share on here encourages one person, then it’s all worth it to me.  

I truly believe that the Lord does not give you more than you can handle, and if someone is feeling buried by life and is able to read a little encouragement from me – then I’ve accomplished my blogging purpose.  So friends – on my blog’s first birthday – I want to say thank you.  Thank you for all of the support and comments and emails over the past year.  I have “met” some amazing women through this blog of mine and if I had it all to do it over again, I wouldn’t change a thing.

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