This week has been one of those weeks. A “blaaaaa” week. Maybe because I had all of last week off for Spring Break and this week is full of work, work, work? Maybe because the spring weather leaves me bitter for being indoors? Or maybe because when I do go outdoors my eyes swell up and I can’t stop sneezing due to all of the pollen. Whatever the reason it’s just been blah.
Lately, I’ve been wondering if what I am doing is really making a difference. Like really. With my little bundle of joy on the way, I am always evaluating and reevaluating decisions I make and my future goals. I want my daughter to be proud of me. I want to be proud of myself. I have been caught in a stupid wheel of comparing myself to others and we all know where that gets us – NOWHERE. And then, I’m constantly asking myself, “What are my goals? What is my purpose? What is important to ME?”
Well it seems that there are two blogging ladies who have been reading my mind this week when this one posted a sweet instagram message and this one posted everything that has been on my heart lately. Rhiannon’s words were like music to my ears on Tuesday. So much truth in what she wrote.
So what’s the point of all of this rambling today? To reiterate what my fellow bloggers have said this week – that we are enough. You are enough. I am enough. Just how we are. With all the decisions we’ve made or not made. We’re still enough. And what we do on a day-to-day basis may not look glamorous to others, but it’s a choice we make for ourselves. And sometimes that choice involves pursuing a childhood dream and watching it come true. But sometimes that choice involves going to a job we may not love but a job that we need to pay the bills, make way for future plans, or pass the time while we figure out what we do want.
So friends figure out what you want. Figure out what makes you happy and fight for it. Fight for it with all of your heart. Me? My husband makes me happy. Our marriage makes me happy, and our marriage is my priority right now. And yes marriage is hard work, but aren’t all things that are worthwhile? My family makes me happy. Spending time with them as much as possible is important to me. My afternoon phone calls – quick or lengthy – with my mama are one of my favorite parts of every day. My faith is important to me. It is important that I am disciplined in reading the Truth and spending time in the Word because it fills my heart with peace. Baking makes me happy (this is a new one). I love it. I can’t stop trying new organic muffin and sticky bun recipes. And you know what? That’s all I know right now. And that’s OK. So for now, I’ll focus on my marriage, my family, my Jesus and my kitchen because I am grateful for them all. And the rest will fall into place.
The important thing is to figure out what matters to YOU. It will look different than anyone else’s list and that’s ok too. In fact, that’s a blessing. Hold on to your unique gifts and desires and use them! Without you, this world would not be the same.
So yes I want my daughter to proud of me. I want her to be inspired by me. But more than anything, I want her to be loved by a happy mama. So I work on that every day. And trust me, she’s already one pretty loved little bun in my oven.
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I'm thinking that last print needs to be in Georgia's nursery... what do y'all think?
xox
